Sunday, July 10, 2011

Do I or Don't I?

I have faced that questions many times in the past.  I faced that twice tonight.  One, I made up my mind using skills I have been learning as a First Responder.  The other, I have yet to make up my mind.

In the first, Hannah fell six feet from a tree stand/tree house and got hurt.  She was crying a lot (obviously) and bleeding a lot.  Looking her over, the blood came from a scalp laceration which means there is a lot of blood by nature.  Her arms also hurt, but there are no breaks.  Sore to the touch, but she still has grip.  She is favoring it, but a wrap to give it extra support while she sleeps brought immediate smiles.  Her head has a gauze on it and it is wrapped.  Keeping it in place while she sleeps will be a bit more difficult.  There are no obvious signs of a concussion and she is in bed with us tonight to keep an eye on her.  So, we decided to not go to the ER unless things change.  Having the emergency radio, Doc's number in my phone, my medical bag, and (if necessary) a drive directly to the ambulance bay if I feel the equipment on the ambulance is needed.

The other is more complex and less direct.  I found my other two children on facebook.  One has an open page, the other is locked down much like mine is.  Do I contact them?  Do I let them know I found them?  Do I tell them who I am?  My immediate response is YES!  But I am not the one who raised them.  Who knows what their view of me is.  Would contacting them cause them harm?  Would not contacting them and them finding out later that I did have a way to finally contact them cause them harm?  They can not find me on facebook even if they wanted to.  (Although there are plenty of other ways to find me.  I do not want to hurt them.  I also want to make sure that I am not being selfish.  I want to contact them and hug them and find out all about them.  I am also afraid.  I admit it.  So is my desire to contact them, yet being hesitant born out of selfishness?  I don't know.


Anonymous said...

Kim hope your little one is good.
As for your other kids, if they are over the age of 18 years old, then yes by all means contact them. But if they are not become friends with them but don't tell them who you are. It may cause problems between them and the ones that did raise them. It is a hard situation. But I know I wish my dad had contacted me instead the other way around. Because I would honestly know if he wanted anything to do with me. If you don't contact them at all you will always wonder what if.

oregonfriend said...

If I remember correctly, you left your ex husband because he was abusive, yet left your children there. I understand the need to get away etc, but not going back to get your kids I will never ever ever understand. You appear to be reasonably smart women. You have a voice, yet you never used it to protect your children. You went on, had another family. WOW! You have a crap load of answering to do, I would be worried if I were you too.

Moi said...

I would keep praying about it and if you feel that the answer is yes, I would contact them, you had no choice to let them, but at the same time, just be cautious that their father could try to contact you and he's probably dangerous...

Really, my answer (for me) would be to pray about it and let God guide you on what to do..

I would do it with another account because if they find your information then your ex husband could fins your blog? Do you think he already has? That would be very scary for you.

If you prefer to answer me on facebook, that's fine with me.